season of change

In my last post I mentioned that the season I am in is a season of change. It has been filled with challenges and discomfort; let's call them growing pains, shall we.

Change really shows me the power of complacency and the living moment . So, I am going to attempt to tell my past 7 months of change in the next 1000 words.

I transferred colleges.

I watched my dad go through his second divorce.

I made new friends (that happen to be amazing).

My grandma found out she was sick.

I went to Chicago on a mission trip (life changing).

My parents quit their job and got new jobs = moving homes, leaving life friends.

That is a run-down of all of the BIG changes that happened in my life recently. Some of these changes taught me the power of complacency and some taught me the power of the moment.

On Complacency-

You truly never know what you are going to miss if you never take the shot. The fear of leaving a place can stop you from reaching the place you really want to be. Now, I am not saying that where you are at is not good or that you are not growing, but do you ever reach a plateau? Like, you're sitting there and wondering why you are not doing what makes you the most happy in life. I have!

That was when I decided to transfer. I wasn't happy at Drury, my heart wasn't happy there. I craved an environment where I could chase God and pursue my future, so I went and it felt good. It clicked! I made friends quick, like people were wondering how I got so connected so quickly and I never knew what to tell them, but it was all Gods sovereignty. His plan is the almighty plan and I want to live my life so clung to Him that my plan is His plan.

Is changing your plans 4 months into your plan that was set for 3 years scary? Heck yes! Is abandoning the plan that God has had in stone since the beginning of time worth it? Heck no! That is why it is so important to listen to the plan that God has for you.

The transition to JBU was hard. There were times that I didn't go to the cafeteria or gym or the student center or the library because I didn't know anyone. I refused to go anywhere because I let the fear paralyze me from doing anything. I hated not knowing anyone, but I clung to God and the few things he gave to me. God provided me with an amazing transfer class that makes me laugh and to bear long nights with. He provided Taylor, a warrior that is so kind and dedicated. He provided me with an amazing JBU staff that is understanding of transfers (I can't even count how many times they told me how happy they were that I was many).

On the Power of the Single Moment-

My grandma was diagnosed with cancer. Normally when someone gets sick I back away and don't cherish those last moments (whether it is 10 more years or 10 more days). My grandma is so strong and I look up to her. She is so wise and man, can that woman cook! This time it was different. I decided that I was going to dive straight in. Call her once a week, ask her how I can pray for her, ask her how she is feeling, and, sometimes, talking about all the food we have eaten since we last spoke.

Family is difficult and my family is no different. Our biggest downfall is emotions; rarely do we do the diving or digging that it takes to be rooted and grow together. Most of the time we are too busy looking at other fields, than cherishing our own bountiful harvest.

Single moments make up our entire life and if we ignore the small things, we just might miss our meaning. I can't share my grandmas pain, but I can share the process. I think often we forget that the journey is what makes us.

As my post concludes I want to remind everyone that the Christian community is truly a community. A home for people. When my grandma found out she had cancer, I reached out to my most loving friends and they prayed like warriors.

Story time: I found out that she was sick and then I processed it for about a week. I prayed, journaled, cried (on repeat) before I told anyone. Then I texted one of my sweet friends and shared the news. This woman has been through the ringer and she knows loss. When I lost my grandpa, we weren't close, this friend and I, but through God's sovereignty I have been able to share that story with her. That tore me apart and I will never be the same (stronger, actually), so when I got this news, losing her was the first things that came to mind. To be honest, it still is. I was afraid that losing her would tear me the same (like full on Hemingway or maybe Poe?). So, when I told her this, she reassured me that God was on my side. Community may not always mean hearing what you want to hear, but it means consistently being pointed and led back to God. It's comforting to have people that tell you the -ish you need to hear.

Thank you for reading, if you made it this far!! I even spared you 14 words. I truly hope you have enjoyed reading this recap of the past few months, I have loved documenting it for you.

Please comment below what you want to read next or see next. This blog is for you, just as much as it is for me!

yours truly,


#WiseWords #CHANGE #RealFeels